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Terrapin Station or “We lost a ten-inch turtle somewhere in our home.”

I blame my sister-in-law.

She showed up this morning with a smug look and a promise that there was an attractively large turtle languishing in our driveway.

Never mind the fact that she let Sue spend the night with the two nieces so we could take the boys to eat Mexican food since Sue cannot abide by Mexican food for some odd reason.

Why I didn’t take a photograph at the time, I will never know but we Googled the turtle, and just about definitively determined the creature to be a box turtle, although his or her feet appeared slightly webbed.

Let’s just pray s/he is not some sort of snapper.

How does such a thing happen?

Well, in the interest of science, I agreed to allow the creature come inside so the boys could embark upon some “research.” A bit later we find ourselves an hour into a great pool visit when I casually remark, “I’m sure one of you took the turtle outside, right?”


The boys look at one another.

“Well, he’s such a slow creature, I’m sure he’s still under the trampoline in the playroom where we left him,” assured Joseph.

I feel such comfort.

Several hours later, I assume the creature will still be huddled quietly in the playroom, potentially trying to siphon water from one of the dog’s slobbery chew toys or render a nest from the revolting shag carpet that graces this particular room.

Such is not the case.

Friends, we have looked everywhere for this terrapin to no avail.  The children are fearful of waking in the night and encountering the beast.

I’ve spread plastic plates of water, blueberries and an occasional errant lettuce leaf around the house in an effort to sustain the creature.

Joseph suggested we catch several crickets and beetles and let them loose since they are the turtle’s natural “prey.”

Let’s hope it does not come that.  Few things are worse than a deceased terrapin languishing in the home.


Posted on 4 June '10 by , under Humor/Disconnected Miscellany.

11 Comments to “Terrapin Station or “We lost a ten-inch turtle somewhere in our home.””

#1 Posted by JoyMama (04.06.10 at 07:15 )

Reminds me of the time my hermit crab escaped…

He showed up again soon, and I’m sure your turtle will too.

Hey, and at least it’s not a hawk! 🙂
.-= JoyMama´s last blog ..Northwoods Adventure: Why We Had to Come Ashore =-.

#2 Posted by Patty (04.06.10 at 08:43 )

Well, my brother once lost his pet tarantula. We scoured the house for days and then finally found it dead near my sister’s shoes in her basement bedroom.

Though, of course, a big turtle might start smelling if it were decaying……Hmmm…I’ll pray you find it soon!
.-= Patty´s last blog ..The Incivility of Yardwork =-.

#3 Posted by Natalie (04.06.10 at 08:57 )

Oh my Lord! Your brood does know how to find trouble doesn’t it! 🙂 Your post made me laugh so hard. I needed that today after a really rough day yesterday with Hannah. Keep us posted on the turtle hunt. I’m waiting on the edge of my seat to see how this turns out.

#4 Posted by the domestic fringe (04.06.10 at 15:16 )

I can’t believe you lost it. IN THE HOUSE!!!

I don’t think I could sleep and I definitely couldn’t get up to go potty in the middle of the night. 🙂

Good luck to you and your turtle friend.
.-= the domestic fringe´s last blog ..Pizza Night Made Crazy =-.

#5 Posted by Jen (04.06.10 at 15:36 )

When I stop laughing I will type something coherent, but for now LOL and I hope he turns up soon!!
.-= Jen´s last blog ..Silly Mama and the Hagu. =-.

#6 Posted by Elizabeth (04.06.10 at 17:17 )

WE FOUND HIM! He was crouched behind a door in the sunroom of all places.

We are, of course, overjoyed.

And yes, he is outside now.

Thanks for the concern!

#7 Posted by mrsbear (04.06.10 at 21:40 )

Ha! Just read your comment update. Thank goodness, I don’t even want to imagine the odors a deceased turtle would begin to produce indoors. Gah! You never EVER invite them in…

#8 Posted by Stimey (05.06.10 at 21:22 )

Well thank goodness you found him. I can only imagine your face when he heard that he was still inside.

I think you are even funnier about the animals than I am.
.-= Stimey´s last blog ..Dipshit Friday: Mouse Mania =-.

#9 Posted by Gavin Bollard (06.06.10 at 22:40 )

Glad you found him again. My tortoise “ran away” (slowly) while I was at school one day. We never found him again – but it wasn’t inside the house.
.-= Gavin Bollard´s last blog ..FTF: Post 5 “Togetherness; A Dad’s Perspective on Marriage” by Gavin Bollard =-.

#10 Posted by kim (07.06.10 at 13:47 )

LOL – so glad you finally found the turtle I can not imagine what he would have smelled like if in fact he met his doom inside the house 🙁
.-= kim´s last blog ..Shred day 20 =-.

#11 Posted by Tari (09.06.10 at 00:11 )

SO GLAD you found him (her?).
.-= Tari´s last blog ..The Book Review I Can’t Write =-.