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Meet Kim, Our Velvet Ant

This morning, I was hastily loading the dishwasher, drinking tepid coffee, washing a sticky grits pan (’cause I live in the South), and twittering madly when I heard, “Hey Mom, you gotta get out here and see what we fouunnd!”

(I had forced them my children into the back yard before it reached 100.)

“This is the greatest one we have ever found because it’s so BIG and RED,” Joseph beckons.

I mentally breezed through the possibilities:  bloody mole, toxic mushroom, poison-arrow-dart-tree-frog-that-has-somehow-migrated-from-Nicaragua.

(Granted, we had a 3-year-old neighbor boy over.  Otherwise I probably would have ignored him.)

What does he hold in his calloused 8-year-old hand?

A Cow-Killer!  Yes, a velvet ant!  A creature with a sting slightly more painful than a wasp’s, but with an incredibly deadly appearance that in no way deters my son’s desire to allow it free reign about his hand.

I gave him a serious look–not enough to alarm–but enough to know I was not joking, and said, “You know they do sting.”

All the other children recoiled in horror.  But Joseph gingerly dropped the creature into a plastic Shoney’s cup, because he’s cool like that, and generally not one to panic.

(I mean this is a child who suffered a spider bite to the “private area” at the age of two that caused his “private part” to swell up within his Blue’s Clues pullup like a large kiwi, spent two nights in the hospital for “observation” and intravenous antibiotics, and never ever once whined or cried.  Not to mention playing an entire youth football game with an arm unknowingly broken in two places.)

So instantly the velvet ant is dubbed “Kim,” proclaimed a pet, and given the recently-vacated home of the Last Living Kindergarten Fish who departed this transient existence about two weeks ago.

The boys did a little research to determine Kim’s needs and found she delights in nectar.  Here you see the “Miss Huff” lantana they carefully chose for her:

So H walks in the door, glances at the aquarium on the kitchen counter, and rolls his eyes.

I counter, “Obviously, you were not following me on Twitter today.  You know nothing about “‘our Kim.”‘

Posted on 7 August '08 by , under Humor/Disconnected Miscellany.

14 Comments to “Meet Kim, Our Velvet Ant”

#1 Posted by MT (08.08.08 at 00:25 )

oh my!!!

My son went from LOVING bugs to sharing in his sisters extreme fear (shrieking) about bugs and now back to LOVING them again. I could really see this happening.

Our kindergarten fish is still alive, now I’ve probably jinxed it plus we have 3 hermit crabs chugging along.

MTs last blog post..Oh no, you just did not….

#2 Posted by Susan (08.08.08 at 00:43 )

Well, it certainly is a pretty ant. Gotta give him that. As far as ants go, he has great taste.

#3 Posted by Tara R (08.08.08 at 01:29 )

mercy!!! I would have a heart attack on the spot if my son brought that to me.

I am truly hoping those don’t live in Canada!

#4 Posted by mrsbear0309 (08.08.08 at 08:24 )

Holy cow that thing looks dangerous, but stinger aside it is gorgeous. I’ve never seen one of those around here for sure, but I’m anti-stinging things. I would have gone into a full blown screaching panic. Yeesh. Happy Friday.

mrsbear0309s last blog post..No Sick Days Allowed

#5 Posted by Lisa@blessedwithgrace (08.08.08 at 08:50 )

First of all, thanks for stopping by. I am now following you on twitter, as well.
This is so funny. I have never heard of a cow killer-red velvet ant. I am summoned my hubby and asked him. “Oh, yeah, they hurt.”. I am a city girl. Oh well. Anyway, we have been having this on going discussion about twitter. For some reason, hubby may seem to think that I spend WAY too much time on the computer. WHATEVER! So, we both got a laugh out of your ending statement about your hubby not following you on twitter for the day. HA!

#6 Posted by Elizabeth (08.08.08 at 10:54 )

I’m so glad to have met you too, Lisa@blessedwithgrace! Our cell phones don’t work very well sometimes, so my husband and I have a hard time staying in real close touch during the day. So now if he asks me what is going on, I just tell him to read my twitter feed! Works so well! I can’t wait to figure out how to use it on my phone. Then I’ll really be dangerous!

#7 Posted by Kim (08.08.08 at 11:24 )

That is so funny and I feel so special to be named after
a red velvety ant
B/c you know how much I LOVE RED 🙂
I am going to link to this post on my blog b/c I feel so special 🙂
Love ya

Kims last blog post..Where has the time gone

#8 Posted by Patty O. (08.08.08 at 13:13 )

What a great post. And a great ant! too cool. Scary, but cool, especially since no one was hurt in the capturing of the red ant named Kim.

#9 Posted by toknowhim (08.08.08 at 16:05 )

Wow, what a beautiful ant, but I would be freaking out!!! I heard about your blog from Kim (Connorcolesmom), and decided to stop by and say hello…Welcome to bloggyville!!

toknowhims last blog post..Starting Up Soon…

#10 Posted by Heidi (08.08.08 at 20:57 )

Delightful! I grew up in the south too, so I know all about the cow ants! And the grits too- awesome!

You’ve got a great blog. If you don’t come over on Wed. and add your link to my Just Humor Me meme, I’m going to track you down! 🙂

Heidis last blog post..OOPS!!

#11 Posted by Trish @ Another Piece of the Puzzle (09.08.08 at 09:31 )

I just have to say – yuck! And how glad I am that my son is not into bugs. 🙂

Trish @ Another Piece of the Puzzles last blog post..Saturday 9: Working in the Coalmines

#12 Posted by Peanut (09.08.08 at 19:07 )

Ooh! Now there’s a bug that gives me chills! Any chance that one might try to clean your kitchen for you?

Thanks for stopping by and it was nice to hear that you liked my pictures (amateur photography seems to be my passion right now)

I hope you’ll be by again. I’ll definitely be visiting you some more!

Peanuts last blog post..A new perspective on bugs

[…] after overwhelming concern regarding Kim’s well-being, we decided as a family that Kim should be set […]

#14 Posted by Three Channels » Tagging (19.10.08 at 21:45 )

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