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It doesn’t go so well for the child star…

So H. took Edward to Publix to get more organic beef for “meat disks”–one of the few foods our picky sweetheart will eat.  He dips them in approximately 1/2 cup of ketchup.  At least it’s protein and it’s GF/CF-free.

Anyway, at the store, who did they run into first?  The famous “Lee” from the trichinosis days.

“Look–there’s Lee again–I’ll bet he’s under-cooking some more meat!  Let’s go see him!”  Edward cried.  Lucky for Lee, he was proffering samples of Breyer’s Chocolate Mint ice cream today.  Not a lot of food-borne illness peril there.

Still, our spontaneous songwriter was able to craft a song on the spot: “Ecoli makes you die.  Ecoli makes you die.”  It’s cheerfully sung to the tune of “Hell, No, We Won’t Go.”  According to H, he “sing-chanted” this throughout the store to the great amusement/concern of many shoppers.  That is, until he ran upon this tantalizing read:

“Why am I not a child star?  I should be a child star?  If I can’t be the ‘strongest boy in the world’ like Richard Sandrak, at least let me be a child star!”

H finally couldn’t take it anymore, so he blasted the poor 6-year-old with the cold, hard, brutal truth:  “Let me just tell you the truth, son: it doesn’t go so well for the child star.  You know those child stars end up either drunk, in jail or lost.”

OK, this is just a recipe for disaster for the next 6 weeks–an obsession with child stars, their neurosis, alcoholism, dyfunctionality–you name it.

It’s the first thing he can discuss with the woman checking the groceries.  “I’m sure you know all about the problems with child stars.  I am not a child star.  Child stars are usually drunks, and they are lost.”

“Did he just say something about child stars being drunks?” the checkout woman asks H.  “He’s a lot, isn’t he?”

“I believe so,” H replied.

And then, to the poor boy taking out the groceries:  “Have you ever been in jail?”

Posted on 3 August '08 by , under "Did He Just Say ?", GF/CF Diet/Food Reviews, Humor/Disconnected Miscellany.

6 Comments to “It doesn’t go so well for the child star…”

#1 Posted by lonestar818 (04.08.08 at 02:17 )

That’s too funny!

Thanks for stopping by my blog, I appreciated your comment 🙂

lonestar818s last blog post..Meltdown 🙁

#2 Posted by Annette Piper (04.08.08 at 06:16 )

Oh my. If I was Lee I would be looking over my shoulder periodically!! What did the boy who carried the groceries out say?

Annette Pipers last blog post..Sunrise

#3 Posted by Elizabeth Channel (04.08.08 at 09:41 )

I do believe Lee is developing a complex, and I’ll bet he wishes he didn’t have to wear a nametag!

After the “jail” question, the poor boy looked fearfully at my husband, who quickly started discussing the weather.

Elizabeth Channels last blog post..It doesn’t go so well for the child star…

#4 Posted by mrsbear0309 (04.08.08 at 18:12 )

lol. Really, the stuff he says is really entertaining. I’m sure it’s embarassing on occasion, but I’m all for making bag boys feel uncomfortable.

mrsbear0309s last blog post..And For An Added Bonus – Paranoia

#5 Posted by Trish @ Another Piece of the Puzzle (04.08.08 at 20:00 )

How funny! I need to write down the next conversation like this I have with my little guy. Sometimes I can’t figure out how we got from the original topic to where we end up. 🙂

Trish @ Another Piece of the Puzzles last blog post..Magic Marker Monday: Getting Zapped

#6 Posted by Kim (04.08.08 at 23:00 )

You know how much I LOVE him -he makes me laugh so hard and conversations are always entertaining
I always feel like I need to read an encyclopedia before I talk to him though – LOL
Love ya

Kims last blog post..Wow – this is totally freaky…